Went to the orthopedic oncologist, Dr. Brian McGrath, today and found out that I do not have to have surgery! Although I'm not totally sure this is medically a great thing, for me (holistically, that is - my emotions, my desire to keep life as normal as possible, to not delay treatment, etc.) it was good news. The doctor also confirmed that, without a biopsy, there is no way to know for sure what type of cancer this is and, therefore, I cannot have any expectations as to what's ahead of me until the biopsy is done and analyzed. While he didn't rule out metastatic breast cancer, he certainly provided a few other types of cancer that could also explain my symptoms. I will be hearing back from my regular oncologist today as to when that biopsy will be scheduled, hopefully within the next couple of days.
Dr. McGrath also told me that, because the bone should regrow after treatment and healing from treatment, I very well may be able to run or do some of the exercising/life stuff that I like to do. Although he made it abundantly clear that I shouldn't be signing up for a 5K yet, I may have the opportunity to run one at some point in my life. Again, no promises, but he was enough of a "straight shooter" that he would have told me to not to expect to do that if he really believed I never would. So that was good news as well.
The only bummer news (well...outside of the general, stinky "you have cancer" news!) is that I need to be using a cane. Seriously? I'm 37 years old and I need a cane. C'mon...how cool is that? I thought driving a mini-van was bad, now I need a cane?!?! No, no...don't even make jokes about the fact that I could get a pretty cane. A cane, I think, is a cane. Whether it has flowers on it or not, right? What's more, after the biopsy is done, I'll need to ditch the cane for...you got it...crutches. Yippee. For 6 weeks I'll be gimping around. I'm trying to come up with an honest - but not too honest of an - answer to have when people ask me why I'm using crutches. If you have any great ideas, I'd love to hear them!
So crutches and a cane may mean that I just may have to say "Yes" to some of the offers to help that you have so graciously and lovingly made. And, although it's difficult to accept that help (because it's a recognition that this traditionally very independent girl just may not be able to do everything she wants and needs to do), I am so very grateful that I now have a list of people I can call. I'm set for the next few days, but you may receive a call from me to see if I could add my grocery list to yours or see if you could do a quick errand or something for me. I very much appreciate knowing that we are not alone as we navigate these new challenges.
One more thing...we haven't told the kiddos yet exactly what's going on. They know that Mommy hurt her hip, but they don't at all know the severity of it all. So, I would appreciate no mention of it when you see us. The kids are at the age when they will pick up on even the slightest of cues and Chad and I want to be able to share this with them once we know what the specific diagnosis is and the exact plan for treatment. I will let you know when that is because I will be calling upon all my praying friends to lift that conversation before the Lord. Overwhelming to think about having a conversation like that with them...having the right words and them processing it all in as good of a ways as possible..that's stuff for hard core prayer.
Again, I am so very grateful for you all. Your words of encouragement and scripture verses sent to me have been so perfectly timed. You are a vehicle through which the Lord's love is flowing.
I'll be in touch soon...